I get most of them being a Limey transplant.
Here's some more...

I saw my mate coming back from the shops pushing a huge trolley full of frozen Lasagna. 
"What are you doing with all that?" I asked him. 
"My six year old daughter wants a horse for her birthday," he replied, "so I'm telling her I've bought one in kit form and she just has to put it together.

My Findus lasagne states it "May Contain Nuts"  Well, at least I'm not eating a gelding. 

BUT! what really baffles me is that every single title when you post something never ever starts with a capital letter. WTF is with that anyway?
I mean a title of a post is kind of , well, a title. So where the fuck did you go to school anyway? Are you one of those Sweathogs from Mr. Kotter's class?